Chemo postpones again AAARRRRGG!!

I had high hopes for this one.  I wasn't feeling too "knocked on my butt" lately, and I haven't been bleeding for about a week, so naturally I thought my blood was up and my platelets were fine.  I went in for fluids today, and it turns out that my numbers are worse than they have ever been.  My white blood count is the lowest its ever been (risk of infections), my hemoglobin is about 3 pints low, and my platelets, good heavens!  42!  (normal = 130-500)  This makes me think that the Lord is for SURE watching over  me and my blood.  Every time I've dipped below 60, I've had crazy bleeding sessions (from my nose, from the pin prick where they stick my port).  So, the fact that I haven't been bleeding makes me think that the Lord is supernaturally holding my blood together, because it for SURE shouldn't be!  Thank you daddy:)  And even though my blood (hemoglobin) is low, I haven't felt that whole "pass out weak" feeling.  Of course, maybe I just haven't noticed it because I've been all rolling around sneezing, sniffling, running, crying, scratching my eyeballs out instead.  It's actually made me question if I might actually prefer nausea over these allergies.  (of course I say that NOW...)

I felt really great after getting fluids today.  I got two bags because I figure I'm pretty dehydrated seeing as it's all coming out my nose.  (yummy!  Better than blood though, am I right?!?!)  I think those two bags helped a lot.  Oh!  And I've noticed an improvement in my chemo brain since they took down my dose of oxylaplatin last time!  I had my first intellectual conversation in MONTHS on Sunday!  It was positively thrilling.  (It's the first time my brain has been able to track with more than small talk and banter.)  So that's good too.  With all my extra energy today, I did about 5 loads of laundry.  I'm pretty proud of myself right now.  I feel downright domestic like!

I'm rescheduled to try again on Monday, so please be praying that my blood would get a swift kick in the pants by then.

Doing much better than last round

Well, I am pleased to say that I am doing a lot better than the last round.  I think this is mainly due to them taking my oxaliplatin down 25%.  It's amazing what that little 25% does!  It is the difference between feeling miserable, hopeless, and defeated vs... well, less miserable but hopeful.  I didn't think it was physically or psychologically possible to go through two more of what it was like last time.  But now, even though I'm not looking forward to it, I feel like "Yeah. It's all good.  I can take one more. " One more folks!!!  Can you believe it?!?!?!  Why, it only feels like a million years since I got diagnosed!  This time has just flown by, like a snail on a turtles back (while sitting atop a truck on 635 during rush hour)!  Haha!

As for levels, I'm not sure what they are right now.  My lovely, wonderful, giving, amazing aunt who always takes me in on Mondays had to attend to her own mother going into the hospital this week.  (We're praying for y'all Urla!)  So, I didn't get to have my blood taken.  I think I'm doing OK though.  I'm having some bleeding, but it's not out of control, which tells me that I'm at LEAST in the 60's.  (Usually, in the 50's is where I can't clot).  I've been eating my pineapple faithfully every day.  I am really hoping that I still like pineapple when this is all over and done with.  I already know that I sorta relate belgium waffles and potatoes to cancer.  ( I used to treat myself to belgium waffles right before chemo every other week.  I no longer have ANY craving for them.  And I had to subsist on potatoes for a good month or two around when I first got diagnosed)  So, I hope that my feelings for pineapple will not follow in the way of Pavlovian response.  I am scheduled for my next chemo a week from today.  I will make sure that someone has my video camera app open when the staff comes in singing and bringing me balloons to celebrate the last chemo.  It will be posted and I will have a big goofy grin on my face.  (granted, that will partially be from the adivan... weeeeeee!!!!) 

Thank you for all of you who have brought food, and thank you again to my mom.  If nothing else, I think this whole experience has shown me what it looks like to serve someone else completely and selflessly.  Both she and my husband have gone so far above and beyond what I ever thought possible.  I am truly blessed. 

So, with all that cancer crap out of the way, I can move on to being truly miserable from ALL THE FRIGGIN' POLLEN!!!!  I mean, holy cow!!  Is there anyone else out there who has been a snotty mess all week?  I have just stayed inside, and kept all the doors and windows CLOSED.  I have even doubled up on allergy pills (which I don't think you are technically supposed to do...) and even THEN my eyes have been all red, and my nose tickling and runny.  I can literally see a green dust all over the stuff on our porch.  Here's a gorgeous picture to remind people how beautiful I am, even on my worse days...

Aren't I lovely?  Thank you Texas pollen!!!